Crazy Collection 1
by luved247
Summary: these are random things I wrote, most of them probably wont make any sense to you, but have fun interpreting it in your own crazy way! Most of them involve Harry/Draco


Crazy Collection #1

A is me (ashley), D is Draco, H is Harry, T is my friend Tanis, S is Snape, P is Pansy, R is for Ron, Hr is Hermione

Shuper smexxeh cult

A- "Join our cult! Join our cult!"

D,H- "WTF?" eyebrow waggle

T- "Eet eez da magical cult of crazeh-nesh!"

H- "BWAHAHA! OKIDOKI I'LL JOIN!" Does interpretive dance about llamas

A,T,D - O.O

A- "Weeeeeee! joins in "mmkay, now its... NEKKED TIME BWAHAHA!"

H- strips "Weee! I WUVS DIS CULT!"

D- drool "Okay, I am SO joining now!" strips and dances with Harry

T- "Woow, didn't think they'd fall for it..." stares "SQUEEE! ME WUVS YAOI!" does crazy happy dance

T,A,D,H- do the macarena nekked

Snapey-poo walks in

S- "WTF is going on here?!"

T,A,D,H- "We've formed a cult and are doing our ritual initiations!"

A- "Wanna join?"

T,D,H - O.e

S- "Ummmm, NO!" runs away squealing like a little girl

D,H,T- "Phew...dats a relief!"

A- "Awww... It would've been fun!"

D,H,T - O.O

A- "Never mind.. how bout we just continue to dance?"

D- "YAY...dancey, dancey, dancey! Without my panties!

T- snigger

A,D,H,D- dance to omabolasire

T- "Now, for the next part of our initiation!" waves wand and everyone is in random outfits. Harry as a skimpy maid, Draco as a naughty schoolgirl, Ash in leather outfit and herself as a sexy goth chick.

D,H- "COOL!" snog each other madly

T,A- drool

D,H- break out into WILD MONKEY SMEX!

A- "My dreams have come true..." faints

T- "WOOW!" O.O faints

We Love Pansy For This...

H- "I hate you!"

D- "No, I hate you more!"

H- "I hate you most!"

D- sticks out tongue and folds arms childishly

H- fingers Draco

D-"Oh no you didn't!"

H- "Oh yes I did!"

D- "Nu uh"

H- "Uh huh!"

D- "Nu uh infinity and beyond! PWND"

H- pout

D- (Wow, he really looks cute when he does that, NO! Do.Not.Think.That.Way! Must...Hate...POTTER!)

H- "Were you just staring at me?"

D- snaps back into reality "Ummm... no I was just thinking"

H- "About what?" sly smile

D- "NOTHING! Now shut your pie hole!" (oh god...he noticed...he noticeed...) panic

H- (hmmm, he's definitely hiding something.. wonder what it is?)

Pansy bursts in not noticing Harry

P- "Oh Drakey-poo! Has Harry said yes to being your boyfriend yet?" giggle

D- "PANSY" I'm going to kill you!"

H- faints

D- "Look into the room to check who's there before you yell stuff like that you annoying child!"

P- "Well technically Draco, I'm older than you... DO NOT SPEAK TO YOUR ELDERS THAT WAY!"

D- "Oh shut it..." sits down defeatedly on floor

P- "Personally, I think you should go for it, you won't have too many chances..."

D- "GET OUT! GET OTTA HERE NOW!"

P- "Jeez, don't get your knickers in a twist... tootles!"

H- wakes up "woow, I just ahd the weirdest dream with pansy and Draco... AHHHH! It wasn't a dream! Oh my fucking merlin!"

D- blushes "Ummmm...Hiya Harry... heh heh heh"

H- O.O "Did you just call me Harry?"

D- "Well you called me by my first name first..." pout

H- (Wow, that's adorible... AHHH! I.DID.NOT.JUST.THINK.THAT! Must.hit.head.over.something...but those lips are so... kissable! Argh! Die Harry DIE!) "Oh, right..."

D- "soooo..."

H- "Yah, sooo"

D,H- sit in 5 minutes of awkward silence

H- "Did Pansy eman what she said?"

D- blush "ummmm" looks away (okay Draco, deep breaths, its now or never!) "yes"

H- O.O blush "Okay then..."

D- "Don't you have anything else to say? Yell?"

H- "No- Should I?"

D- "I guess not- can I just do something quickly?" looks away

H- "ummm okay..."

D- slowly crawls over to Harry to sit down beside him and give him a quick kiss on the lips

H- blush "umm Draco...?"

D- Turns head to look back at Harry only to find his lips on his own with Harry's hands placed firmly on his shoulders pressing them closer together

Snape, Ron and Hermione walk in (don't ask why)

Three crashes separated the two boys from each other. They looked behind them only to find the bodies of Snape, Ron and Hermione lying unconscious with looks of shock on each and every face. Ron actually looked like he was about to gag...

D- "Ummm... How about we continue this in a more secure location...?" wink

H- "Room of Requirement, 10 minutes?"

D- evil grin "okay- should leave me enough time to get prepared..."

H- "Prepared for what exactly?"

D- "You'll see my dear, you'll see!" cackle

Draco's pads

Draco had just come back from a private quidditch lesson with Mme. Hooch. The boys change rooms were being renovated thanks to a donation from his very own father. Not knowing where to change he walked into the deserted girls change room. Draco took a quick shower to freshen up and changed into his new robes (green with silver lining of course)! Draco looked around at his surroundings, there was a machine labeled "napkins" one for twenty-five knuts. That was fairly expensive for a bloody napkin! He did need one though because on a hot day like this he would surely start sweating again. He put in the ridiculous 25 knuts and turned the knob. A box came out, odd.. Draco opened the box to find a very thick, professional looking napkin. He had never seen one like this before.. Oh well. Draco headed out with his stuff to the great hall because lunch had already started five minutes ago. As suspected the Great Hall was blistering hot. You'd think that Dumbledore would have enough sense to install fans or air conditioning. Draco took out the napkin he had in his pocket and wiped his forehead and face with it before sitting down beside his fellow Slytherins. Draco raised his eyebrows, why was everyone staring at him? I mean he was good looking and al but this was ridiculous! Suddenly all the girls in the Great Hall burst into laughter. Hermione, I mean granger, was actually rolling on the floor with maniacal giggles! The whole world was fucking insane... Draco turned to face the teachers table. Snape had turned a bright purple and was sinking down in his chair out of view, Mcgonagal, Mme. Hooch and Prof. Sprout were also bursting with laughter, and all the other professors had a strange pinkish tinge on their cheeks and were avoiding eye contact with anybody, even Dumbledore! Hermione walked up to draco, book in hand as always, and shoved the book under his nose, stifling her laughter. Draco's widened in shock, oh shit! He ran out of the hall red with embarrassment.. There was no way he could cast a memory charm on all those people!

Cocoa

D- "Harry do you want some of my hot, steamy, passionate..."

H- O.O nosebleed

D- "Cocoa?"

H- "Ummm no thanks, i've got to go!" runs to take a cold shower

Sirius...

Random Dude- "Honestly, I'm DEAD SERIOUS!"

Harry- "Holy shit! You're my godfather!" GLOMP

Random Dude- "WTF?"

Random Shit

Dumbledore- "Bitch! You did NOT just call me Santa!"

Flitwick- "BETCH! YOU DID NOT JUST CALL ME SANTA"S LITTLE HELPER!"

Dumbledore- "Bitch! You did NOT just call me Gandalf! I am WAY cooler than Gandalf... and for that... CRUCIO! MWAHAHAHA, your precious Gandalf can't save you!"

It Actually Happened

H- "Professor snape? Can I go to the loo please?"

S- "Fine, if you must"

H- tries to open door but can't

Class- sniggers

D- "Need some help with that door Potter?"

Harry's face was burning with shame as he heard the class' laughter in the back of his mind. "Need some help with that door Potter?" Harry practically jumped out of his skin, Draco's voice breathed into his ear seductively. Malfoy's hand wrapped around Harry's waist, wand in hand and he whispered "alohamora". Malfoy turned on his heel brushing Harry's hand gently as he walked by. Harry's eyes widened in shock and he rushed out of the classroom, turning redder... and harder every second.

OK2B GAY

H- (singing) ITS OK2B GAY! REJOICE WITH THE BOYS IN A GAY WAY!

...Draco walks in...

D- O.o "POTTER?! I always knew you were a fag by the way you walk!"

H- "says the one who actually watches me walk..." smirk, eyebrow waggle

Sloooow

D- "Hey! Look at this huge thing!" (x20) looking at lock

H- "WHAAT!"

D- "The lock dumbass... its HUGE!"

H- "Oh right, the lock..." looks down, shuffles feet awkwardly

D- "What did you think?" confused expression

Happy Time

D- "What's with that white stuff on your shirt potter?"

H- "Happy time... happy time..." XD

D- "That's disgusting..." (I wonder to waht though...)

H- eyebrow waggle

D- O.O (well that answers my question...) "BYE!" run

Innuendo's 

H- "I'll do something painful to you with my wand!"

D- "Oh really potter? I'd like to see that, you on top? HAH!"

H- "What are you- OMM You're a pervert!"

D- "Don't tell me you've never though about it before?"

H- "That's not the point... I mean NO!"

D- "Who would have guessed..." smirk "If you're still mad at me I give you permission to do VERY evil things to me with your wand..." eyebrow waggle

H- O.O

D- "I thought so.. you don't have the guts!"

H- gets out of trance "What! I have all the guts and equipment to make you scream in pleasure!"

D- "Well then, I'll see you in the room of Requirement at ten Potter" wink

All Parents Leave Week

H- "Ha I don't want to know what would happen in that one week..."

R- "Yeah, the world like explodes or implodes..."

H- "Actually I was thinking more along the lines of a wild orgy..."

R- "SWEET!"

Care of Magical Creatures

Prof. Grubbly-Plank- "You have to blow up the unicorn and amke it bigger."

H,R- snigger

D- "What are you sniggering about Pothead, Weasel?"

H,R- look at draco like he's very s.l.o.w

D- O.O "Ohhhhhh... BWAHAHAHAHA"

Hr- "Did he just laugh and smile?" ... O.e

D- face turns stony "No, it was all your imagination and if you say otherwise I'll send my thooper dooper cronies after you!"

H- "HA! He said thooper dooper!"

D- "shuddup..."

H,R,Hr- "WE WON!" XD


End file.
